We as human beings bring ego side into our daily lives. One of the qualities is our ability to make assumptions. Assumptions are often beliefs generated by what we assume around our perceptions of the interaction. It gets caught up on personal bias and projection and past events.
Robert Heinlein in his book "Stranger in a Strange Land" introduced the concept of Fair Witness. This is an individual trained to observe events and report exactly what is seen and heard, making no extrapolations or assumptions. In the book, the Fair Witness is known for professionals impartiality, integrity, objectivity, and reliability.
An example would be asking a Fair Witness what color a house is in front of them? The Fair Witness would answer 'it is white on this side.' It is the only side the Fair Witness can see and so that is what is reported.
One of the dangers of assumptions in our lives is that we often decide it means someone is exactly like us in belief. We don't take the next step of checking in to know what the other person is thinking about.
We do a monthly podcast and often one of our questions is always "What would you want the world to know about you?" This actually translates to what question you want to make sure we ask today; now please answer it.
This assumption process gets in the way of communication. When I was in sales, there was a phrase of training called 'just start over.' This gave the opportunity to stop reaction when knocked off the normal sales pitch. Our sales manager taught us to work on the philosophy that when the customer said no they just didn't understand us. So it was our job to go back to begin again. We would start the sales pitch again from the beginning. Perhaps this is why many find sales people just plain annoying.
So there is a song called "Begin Againers." The lyrics speak to the incredible fact of the universe that in our assumptions and our choices and our actions we can make new choices. We can choose again. This helps us stop some of the anxiety about our choices.
Assumptions in choosing let our memories of the past build our present moments and then let the angst planning for the future distract us out of the present.
Our choices are always simple when done in the now. If we slow down in choosing there is more clarity in the process. Remember we are the architects of our own experience.
It is important that we take a slow look as we make a chocie and make sure we have all our information to make an educated choice. Then always remember we can choose again.
Again let's go back to a verse of Scott Mulvahill's song called "Begin Againers." It describes the truth that we always have the second chance to choose again, to begain again. The verse states "There's nothing wrong like a clean slate, You get another shot, to do things like you meant to the first time you, picked up the chalk."
But in order to choose again we must let go. It is part of the Let Go and Let God process. Most of our letting go is covered in scratch marks.
So when you come to that fork in the road and we discover your choice has been a poor one or a dead end - choose again or begin again.........what a blessing and a gift. It is a part of the process of life!
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