This is another one of those weird blogs that I'm writing because of my age. I suddenly realized the other day there is a disturbing trend in my life.
It seems that in different phases of my life I had different methods of socialization. During my 20's, I attended parties to drink, to be seen, and to meet girls. Then in my 30's I was out in the world in gatherings with large groups of friends. I can remember attending a party called "Celebration of Places Hair is Growing on My Body that I Never thought it would." During this gathering, the group was charged with bringing musical instruments and noise makers. The Doobie Brothers had put out an amazing new album called "What were Once Vices are now Habits" and we group sang every song on the album.
In my 50's and 60's I stepped deep into spirituality and became very active in ministry as I worked in a church and held sacred space.
But now comes the disturbing trend. I only say that because it's one I can become very resistant about. It is the fact that the further along in life we move the greater number of our circle die before we do. Our social circle becomes smaller and smaller. But in the end, funerals start to become a big social event in our lives. It is where we see people and reminisce about things.
Each celebration of life is a chance to see a life shared by a group. In some cases, the method is simple and it is a very, very traditional gathering. But some have quirky parts that reflect the character of the person who passed. I attended a funeral years ago of a friend and neighbor who was a safety engineer and meticulous about life. We had filled the church and sat and waited to bring the casket in - the casket was late. When his wife spoke she started off with the fact that his charactistic continued. He was always late for everything so it made perfect sense to all who attended that he was late and we had to wait to start.
I've mentioned this before - the concept that there should be a rehearsal funeral just like a rehearsal wedding dinner. It would be way cool to hear what everyone was going to say.
I've put together some thoughts for Rachel if I go first and some of my thoughts don't make sense. I've toned it down a bit; I don't want people walking out of the funeral.
There is an entire realm of plqnning thqt stqtes we should be ready to die. This includes hqving qll our informqtion in one place for quick use. But I think even more so` it is our obligation to make our transfer from the present to q celebration of life filled with the things we want. Not that it makes any difference to whom we are. After all, it is easiest for us - we're gone! But it definitely will help those who hold sacred space for us.........
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